The LAST car I ever sold

            So in my time as an internet sales manager at a Ford store I had a lot of strange contacts.  You would think that people who are trying to save time by conducting most of the transaction online would want to keep things simple.  On the contrary most of the people who started shopping for a car online made it more complicated and challenging than if they would have just stopped in and said hello.

            Having said that there are certain times when you simply can’t help but make it more complicated than it needs to be.  For example, if you’re in an active combat zone and you’re trying to buy a car for a surprise visit stateside.  That is where the last car I will ever sell started.

            I got an email lead one day through our USAA lead source.  I took special care of these leads as they were usually members of our armed forces or their families.  Regardless I respect what they do for our country and wanted to give them every possible courtesy as thanks for their sacrifices.

            The email I got was from a young man who wanted to buy a black on black California special Mustang GT 5.0, manual we had on the lot.  It was one hell of a sexy looking car and from the day it showed up I kept checking in on it whenever it was within eye sight.

            The USAA pricing made things super easy for us.  At the time it also meant that I was only going to make $150 on the deal because of the overly aggressive pricing my (now fired) GM had put on these deals.  The price was the price and the rest was just pushing paperwork through.

            At first it was emails back and fourth making sure the car had the right features and options.  I noticed the emails had “declassified” on them and made it a point to jokingly ask my customer what was going on.  He told me he was in a forward operating base in Afghanistan and the emails had to go through a screening process to make sure he wasn’t giving out intelligence. 

            Finally after several emails I told the young Marine he was welcome to call me, day or night, either at the dealership or on my cell phone.  I know he would only get a small window to do so and I worked crazy hours so something had to line up.

            The next day I get a phone call from a “kid” with lots of “yes sir” and “no sir” answers…I knew right away it was the Marine.  He told me he wanted to buy the car and drive it to his sisters wedding in 3 months as a surprise.  I told him what we would need to do in order to make that happen with power of attorney and a deposit.  As soon as I said “deposit” he said “oh shit” and abruptly hung up.

            Not having a way to call him back I wrote him an email and explained the steps on what he needed to do.  The next morning I returned to work to find a reply in my inbox saying “sorry about that…we were taking mortars and I had to get to cover.  Is the car still there?!”.  I sat staring at my screen for a few minutes letting that sink in.  This “kid” was more concerned about blowing his mustang deal than he was getting killed by mortar rounds.

            His mom had to get in the mix as the stateside power of attorney and she collaborated with me to send all the documents we needed.  When we had the paperwork together I told him all we needed now was the deposit.  I got 3 emails in rapid succession with his credit card info on them.  About an hour later I get a call from him.  “Hey did you get those emails?  I was in my can, on a toilet, with the fob out the vent hole, trying to get a wifi signal while we took more rounds.  F@$kin’ Taliban”  (“can” was the concrete bunker he lived in.  Apparently there was a vent hole they Marines figured out had a wifi signal if you could see the communication bunker)  He had been hitting the send button over and over again to make sure the email got sent.

            At this point the car was his.  We sent a courier up to his family in South Dakota to discretely have his mom sign the paperwork.  His dad, a long haul trucker was on the road at the time so it was perfect.  The Marine emailed me saying his dad would be in Omaha that weekend dropping off a load of cattle and he wanted to see the car.  “Now remember, my dad doesn’t know I’ve already bought the car so just act like I’m still considering it.”  I agree to meet his dad on Sunday, when the dealership was closed, to take him for a ride.

            Sure enough Sunday afternoon his dad pulls up in a truck with a load of cattle.  If you’ve never smelled someone who hauls cattle before it takes a few days to get it out of your nose and mouth.  It’s a very “earthy” smell and I knew this going in…but this guys story had me hooked.  We took a test drive and his dad smiled the whole time, he was loving every second of the drive.  “Well shit…guess I’m not a Camero guy anymore!”  I parked the car and told him we’d have to get back in touch with his son and see if we could work out numbers.

            I put a sign in the cars windshield for the next 3 months.  “Welcome Home Marine  SOLD”  We made it a point to walk people past the car to show them how we took care of our armed forces.  I kept the keys in my desk and had him send me a letter stating I was allowed to retain ownership and/or operate the vehicle as needed to facilitate his ownership.  I didn’t want my “evil” manager or my less than bright GM saying I stole the car.  At this point I had also made up my mind to quit after I delivered the car to the Marine.

            The final week rolled around and I get flight times for his arrival into the Omaha Airport.  Friday at 1pm I was going to deliver the car and then on my return to the dealership I was going to quit.  I told a friend of mine the night before for some reason and she told my GM the next morning.

            Friday morning rolls around and I’m rather chipper knowing I’m hours away from being done.  Our GM calls an all sales meeting after his morning beating of the other managers.  He went through the room checking our schedules making sure we had coverage and then dismissed everyone except me and 2 of the other managers.  “I know today is your last day…I’ve known this for some time.”  He said.  (total lie and just positioning)  We go through a laundry list of things about how I’m doing, what’s wrong, where am I going…etc.  My responses by the way were:  “I’m pissed off every day and taking sleeping aides at lunch to calm down”, “I make $150 a car with the internet pricing you put in place so I’m broke”, and “I have NO IDEA but at least its not here”.

            I but a great big bow on top with a middle finger with this one, “I would have quit 3 months ago but I promised a Marine in Afghanistan I’d pick him up in his Mustang at the airport so he can surprise his family.  (I actually had the letter in my pocket stating I could do this…just in case)  I made a promise to a man who is fighting a war…I intend to keep it.  His flight gets in at 1pm…then I’m done.”

            He makes a few more petty attempts to keep me on and I blow it off.  As I’m walking out one of the other managers shakes my hand and said “that was awesome”.  (he quit a month or two later as well)  I was “allowed” to deliver the car but wasn’t supposed to return afterward.  A lot porter and friend of mine helped me get my car downtown to my place and give me a ride back so I had nothing left there.

            I got in the Mustang and drove it to the airport later that day.  I’m not sure if it was the sense of finally being free of the nightmare that was that job or if it was the V8 under my foot…but that drive felt amazing!  I pulled up to the gate right as I got a text from the Marine.  “Out front”

            He wasn’t hard to miss on the street.  “Jarhead” haircut, built like a brick shit house, and holding a green duffle bag over his shoulder.  I revved the engine a few times as I entered the concrete “canyon” where you pick people up.  The smile on this guys face said it all.

            “Corporal, I believe this is your car sir.”  As he walked over a group of guys blurted out “NICE CAR BUDDY!!!”  “Its his…as of right now.”  And with that I put the keys in his hand and shook the other.

            He spent the next 5 minutes in awe.  So much so that the airport police told us we had to leave and I had to drive because he hadn’t driven stick in a few years.  I drove it like I owned it…but I definitely gave the car an opportunity to show what it could do.

            We pulled up outside my girlfriends condo downtown.  I showed him how to work everything and paired his phone.  I gave him a few recommendations on places to eat in town if he was hungry and pointed him in the direction of the interstate to get driving to his sisters wedding.  “How will you get home sir?” he said as I closed the door from outside.

            “Actually I’m going to walk home…I quit this morning.  This is the last car I will ever sell.  I made you a promise 3 months ago and have been waiting for this day.  Now have a safe trip home Marine, enjoy your family.” 

After a few “seriously!??!” comments and he realized I was serious about the whole deal he got out of the car, walked around to my side and gave me what I can only describe as the most profoundly grateful handshake I have ever had. 

As I walked the few blocks back to my apartment I heard the sound of a 5.0 V8 coming dangerously close to the redline and a less than perfect shift into 3^rd disappear onto the onramp of the interstate.

Months later when he was home for good, I got a sheepish text from him asking how to reset his phone in the car.  He apparently didn’t feel right calling the dealership and asking them how to do it.  Honestly, I was just glad to hear the guy was home safe so I had no problem helping out one last time.

So why post this in this blog?  Its simple, integrity.  I worked in an industry where everyone…I mean EVERYONE thinks you’re a crook or you’re lying.  It is one of the reasons I got so angry all the time.  When I told them something I wasn’t lying…it was the truth, but was called a liar on an hourly basis in many different ways.  Other salespeople may not have had the integrity to do the right thing and help this kid buy the car.  It took months, logistics were a nightmare, and I jumped through more hoops than any other deal I did as a car salesman.  But at the end of the day I made that Marines dream come true and his family got a moment that can never be recreated.  Me…the lying cheating no good car salesman…a man of integrity did that.  Whenever I think back to all the horrible things I experienced in my time as a car salesman they all go away when I think of that black on black California special Mustang GT.

The power of merchandising, and a scary looking power tool

            In my time as a wine and spirit distributor I had a blast merchandising my territory to sell more alcohol.  Its no surprise the reason Budweiser sells so much beer is because everywhere you look you see their logos.  It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that the more your brands are seen in a location the more likely they will be purchased, and then reordered by your customer.

            With that in mind I started to cover my territory with point of sale materials.  At one point I was actually yelled at for taking out too much point of sale materials from the warehouse!  My manager at the time laughed and told the vice president who wanted to write me up “you’re going to write him up for doing what nobody else is doing?”  and after a long pause the subject was dead.

            He was right, we had TONS of stuff sitting in the warehouse collecting dust that nobody was using.  So, being a resourceful person, I started taking everything I could get my hands on and using it to promote my stuff.

            One of my favorite accounts was a marina on the river just north of town.  The place wasn’t much to look at but it was a great summer hangout for locals and boaters going up and down the river.  They sold a ton of drinks and until I showed up hadn’t really had anyone supporting them from my company.

            I brought up anything island themed I could find in the warehouse.  Fake palm trees, inflatable beach balls, necklaces, blinking lights, you name it.  The industry term for some of the smaller items is/was “trinkets and trash” by the way.  I billed out a few bar kits with other supporting items like shirts and table tents.

            After I get their attention they let me decorate the entire bar with whatever I wanted!  They were selling my stuff like it was going out of style and the orders were starting to show it.

            I billed out a few bar mirrors and took them up with a box of 6” long deck screws.  As I was driving in the screws with my cordless drill the owner came up.  “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?!”  I finished the one screw I was working on and turned to her.

            “I figure someone is going to steal these mirrors…they’re nice right?”  She nodded.  “So…if some drunk wants to back 36 inches of deck screws with a dime or their bare fingers…they can have this.”  With that the shocked look on her face turned into a smile and she began to laugh.

            “You’ve got a point!”  and with that she walked off to tell the rest of the staff the story.

            After a few bar parties and a few weeks of proving I was there to stay it came time to pitch the big pitch.  They finally trusted me with their signature drink recipe and wanted to see if we could make it cheaper for them.  In their hay days they would take 55 gallon trash cans and mix up 5-6 at a time to keep up with demand.

            I worked out the numbers and grabbed my Black & Decker reciprocating saw with a 10” blade on it.  The day I decided to make the big pitch I happened, not entirely on accident, to show up when my biggest competitor showed up.  I was planning on stealing one of his biggest accounts for rum.  At the time they happened to use Captain Morgan Parrot Bay for their coconut flavored rum…I sold Malibu.

            I sauntered into the bar and saw my competitor walking through a normal shelf order, a few bottles here and there.  After nodding to him I pulled up a chair at the bar and pulled out my reciprocating saw and dropped it on the bar.  I went about my business and ignored the two of them while he hurried up his final few points.  He made a back handed comment about my saw and left, seemingly unconcerned about what I was doing.

            The bar manager asked “What the hell is that for?” and I told him not to worry about it.  I went about pointing out the half empty bottles on the bar and seeing what he needed.  “No, seriously…what the hell is that for?”  He kept breaking the conversation to ask, each time I pushed on with the normal order.  “DAMNIT…WHAT IS THAT THING DOING ON MY BAR!?!?!” 

            I smiled and said “Well you know what this is right?”

            “Yeah, it’s a Black & Decker power saw…”  I slapped the tool like it was a good dog.

            “And how did you know what it was?”  I asked.

            “Everybody knows Black & Decker…its one of the biggest names in power tools…”  I nodded.

            “So if everybody knows the quality, the reputation, and the pedigree that comes with this brand what does it say about someone who uses it?”  I asked.

            “It means you know what the f*@k you’re doing…”  I smiled.

            “So if you use a knock off brand what does that make you?”  and with that I leaned in to hear his response.

            “It means you’re a moron…”  he threw back with an indignant tone in his voice.

            “Ok…so if all that’s true…why are you NOT putting Malibu Coconut rum in your main drink?  It’s the original coconut rum everyone knows…”  and in the middle of the somewhat corny response his jaw went slack.  “Captain Morgan is a cheap knock off brand that imitates Malibu.  I know it, you know it, your customers now it.  If they cost the same per ounce what would you choose?  Better yet, if I could get you a better deal on the original brand and support it with island themed signs and other fun stuff for the bar do you think you’d sell more?”

            I’ll spare you how the rest of this interaction went and get to the punch line.  The next week the very same VP who wanted to write me up for taking out too much point of sale materials called me to make sure I hadn’t made a huge mistake on an order.  “Justin I’m looking at 3 ½ pallets of product going to a Marina in your territory…did you mean to put in bottles and instead hit cases?  We need to cancel this order before it goes out!” 

            I wish I could have been there to see the look on his face when I said, “Nope…no mistake…all $12,000 of that order needs to ship.  They’re on the way with 3 trucks now to pick it up.  We may need a refill by the end of the summer too.”  My little stunt with the power saw had sealed the deal to switch over everything in the bar they could to me.  I went from 15% market share in the bar to 75% or more because of the volume we were now doing.

            Unfortunately the bar ended up on some hard times later that summer.  The owners son was found dead in the bed of his pickup truck, he had aspirated on his own vomit.  The bar manager who was sleeping with the owner had ran off and the “kids” who ran the bar had left without warning.  1/3 of the order had to come back to avoid losing it to the bank in the bankruptcy.

            The VP never got on my case for merchandising again.  Suppliers actually started asking me what I wanted to put up in my territory directly!  Never underestimate the power of brand awareness.

The smelly truck that sold - Good Manager story #2

            So I tipped my old manager off that I was writing a “compare and contrast” blog between his management style and my other manager while in the car industry.  True to form he was very thankful of the praise but humble in his response.  With that kind of attitude I was reminded of a deal I got caught in the middle of.

            In the auto industry the “holy grail” for some guys is a diesel truck with a stick shift.  Why major auto makers don’t offer this anymore is beyond me, they sold like crazy with HUNDREDS of thousands of miles on the odometer.  We happened to have a truck like this in inventory one week.

            The demand for these trucks are so high this truck had a unique story to it.  A tree had fallen on it during a storm.  The tree had dented the fenders, roof, door, and broken out some lights on the flat bed on the back.  (no rails just a flat metal surface)  But rather than fix it we left it as is and sold it that way.  The phone rang off the hook for days on this truck.

            I finally got ahold of a guy who wanted the truck.  He had a truck that was 2 years older and used it for work.  He was a (legit) professional cowboy in North Platte NE.  He was a pen rider in the cattle yards and spent his entire day in the saddle on horseback.  In his spare time he made and sold saddles!  His truck had the smaller engine offered by Dodge and was an automatic.

            “You realize a tree fell on this thing right?”  I said skeptically over the phone.  “Yup, don’t care…its perfect!  I’ll take it!” you could hear the excitement in his voice.  So we worked out the deal over the phone and because he was a nice guy I offered to meet him half way between Omaha and North Platte.  Cutting his 5 hour drive to 2 ½ and meeting him on a Sunday to boot!

            My finance manager dragged his feet on getting the paperwork for me all week and finally handed them to me on Saturday night.  I looked through the paperwork and noticed a $1800 charge for undercoating on the truck.  When I asked him about it he said “Don’t worry about it…it helps her hit her number for the month.  You’re good…just get him to sign it.”  “Her” in this case was our aftermarket specialist who was making money for nothing and had her own issues.

            “(Expletives deleted) you’re giving me a hot deal for me to deal with, on a Sunday, knowing I have to drive a truck that has been used in a cattle ranch back to Omaha?!?!?”  And, he laughed…she laughed too…they thought it was hilarious and I was stuck with nobody left in the building to change the documents.

            That night I happened to spend some time with my (good) manager outside of work.  He could see that something was bugging the hell out of me and when he asked it came spewing out of me.  I could see he was also pissed about the situation as he had worked hard to put the deal together on his end.

            I decided to take the truck out there and present the information to him.  In the back of my head I knew we could always amend the paperwork and send him the papers in the mail.  I left the next day for my all day affair in the trucks.

            About 30 minutes into the drive an alarm went off in the truck.  The diesel particulate filter was (apparently) full and the truck went into “limp mode” where it “limps” into a dealership to be fixed.  In a panic I get on my phone and try to figure out what the hell happened, only to have my phone die…with no charger.

            I get to town a little early and stop by 3 different auto stores seeing if they can fix it.  They weren’t any help and in the process the drivers side window got stuck open.  Apparently the damage to the door wasn’t allowing it to roll back up.

            After taking a deep breath and buying a charger for my phone I drove over to the truck stop to meet my customer.  He shows up with his wife and kids.  The little boy gets out, in full cowboy attire, and runs up to his new truck and calls “SHOTGUN”. 

We walk around the truck and he’s in love.  I show him the damage spots and he’s ok with them because they’ll probably get beat up when he uses it.  He even knows how to fix the window and isn’t worried about it.  The diesel particulate filter isn’t even a problem for him because he’s got a diesel guy at the yard who can fix it! 

After introducing me to the family and walking around the truck I ask him if they were doing anything else in town while they were here.  “We’ll probably grab a bite to eat since they’ve got restaurants we don’t have in our town”

            “Lets go do the paperwork at Buffalo Wild Wings then!”  The family blows up with excitement… “On me as a thank you because of the window thing too”

            After a lunch I’ll never forget where I learn more about cows than I’ll ever need to know I hand him the papers.  He signs them all and reads through everything.  He even puts his finger on the $1800 charge but doesn’t say a word, my heart breaks.  We wrap up the paperwork and I swap keys with him.  The kids give me a hug and he gives me the kind of solid handshake you would expect to come from a solid guy like this.

            His trade had at least 1” of “dirt” on the inside along with horse hair, cow hair, dog hair, and god knows what.  I drove home with the windows open so I could see through the tears in my eyes.  Oh yeah, did I mention he drove his truck home, with the window stuck open, in 35 degree weather for 2 ½ hours?

            On the drive home the base of my skull goes numb.  I’m so angry at what had just happened I felt like I was on the verge of an aneurism.  I get back and call my manager and he calms me down.  “Don’t worry buddy…I’ve got a plan for Monday”

            Monday morning comes in and I literally throw the deal in my finance managers face.  I have a few choice words for him too but you can guess what I said.  As I walk out of his office I’m met in the hallway with my (good) manager.

            He’s got a copy of the deal in hand and has the charge highlighted.  He closes the door and has a long conversation with the finance manger.  I never get to find out what was said but things changed from that day on with our finance department.

            We call the guy who has since noticed the strange charge.  I agree that the charge shouldn’t be there and we give him a few options.  We could send him a check for the amount or we could buy a brush guard/cow pusher bumper for him with the money.  He was planning on putting one on the truck when he had the cash and we could get a discount on the deal.

            He ends up taking the bumper and uses the remaining money to buy a second hand exhaust to fix the diesel particulate filter issue.  We fix the paperwork and everything goes back to the way it should be.  When I call him a month later he invites me to stay with his family and go Coyote hunting sometime.  The kids are in the background and I can hear them ask “Is that Justin?!  Tell him hi”.

            The way that deal went down the (evil) manager could have made it stick.  We delivered papers and the customer accepted them with the vehicle.  “Congratulations, you’re an owner” goes the line from the movie Suckers.  But instead the (good) manager and I found a way to work around the wrong doings of others and in the process put a stop to future shenanigans.  From that deal on our “shoot from the hip” finance manager cleaned up his act and never pushed a dirty deal through me again.  Finding an ally when it comes to doing the right thing is always important.  I was so furious my “options” at the time were to punch the finance guy in the face or quit, or both.  Cooler heads prevailed and while the process was a bit painful, and smelled terrible, it worked out benefiting the rest of our group.

The "evil" manager Round 2... FIGHT

            With a deep sigh, its time for another installment of the one end of the managerial spectrum to stay away from.  That’s right, time to hear more horror stories from my old manager.  This time its got a positive spin on it.

            In my time as an Internet Sales Manager at the dealership I was the longest consecutive person in that position.  People had been promoted, fired, or a combination and ended up in the same role again.  The beauty of the position was it completely ignored what you were told about how to get promoted in the company.  (different blog)

            We were having our entire building renovated and we were moving offices for the fourth or fifth time to accommodate construction.  The three of us at the time were a little upset that the process took several hours to move and setup everything but we were still expected to make calls and have the same response time to emails.  This is kind of difficult when your computer is in a box waiting for you to finish reassembling your desk.

            This time one of our crew was off and the remaining two were moving for the three of us.  Needless to say we were less than excited and were having fun commiserating in the process.  Out of the blue one of our junior salesman stops in to avoid doing his work and talk to us.

            “Where’s mike?”  now this salesman was a bit of an arrogant and/or nosey person who would be upset about not getting enough deals but spent his time playing games on his phone or hiding from customers.  Frequently he would come back to our office to kill as much time as we would let him away from the managers who could actually fire him for this.  Today he happened to hit a nerve and I decided it was time to teach the nosey kid a lesson.

            “Mike quit.”  I looked at my buddy, who shared the same feelings toward him, and he instantly got where I was going with this.  “Yeah, he told us he was done and we’re just packing up his stuff for his wife.”  He gestured to all of Mikes stuff in a box on the table.

            “Nuh uh” and after a few shocked seconds he left, mission accomplished.  After about 10 to 20 minutes he came back.  “Hey, um…were you guys just messing with me?”  But he was asking it in an alarmed tone instead of a “you got me tone”.

            “Yeah, we’re tired of you coming back here and bugging us…you can’t hide from your job…” and with that he turned ghost white.  I stopped talking and asked “Why?” feeling something was amiss.

            “OH CRAP…I just told Gene (our General Manager) he quit!” and at that point I faught the urge to slap him, open handed, full bore as I walked out to cut off the damage he had done.

            “Justin to Gene’s office” rang out over the PA system as I was in the doorway.  I stopped dead in my tracks and hung my head.  Lets just say the words I muttered to the junior salesman had an impact as he slowly backed away from me and never came back to our office again.

            I ran in the door and I see my General Manager and my (evil) manager on every phone in the office trying to reach Mike.  I’m not kidding they had cell phones and land lines ringing trying to get in touch with him. 

            “I already know…it was a prank…I was trying to teach…” and with that they pulled the phones from their ears. 

            “So you’re saying Mike didn’t quit.”  I shook my head yes.  And with that it began.  My general manager cracked a smile in his own twisted way and hung his head.  My other manager turned beet red and it began.

            “WHYYYYYYY WOULD YOU DO THAT?”  He ranted and raved for a few minutes and I figured I had it coming so I didn’t say a word.  “If you spent half as much time selling cars as you do jacking around you’d be the top guy here!”

            As it sat at the time I was the number 3 guy in the dealership that month and only because I hadn’t written any “house deals” from managers that month.  So, in essence I was the legitimate top guy that month but on my own accord without a sweetheart deal handed to me.

            It was also at this point I realized I was standing fully upright, rigid even.  My jaw was clinched and my hands were in fists.  The kind of fists where you can see the tendons and bone glowing white through the knuckles.  I realized I was about to knock him out if I didn’t change my mind, and fast.

            I took a breath and relaxed.  From my time as a bouncer I remembered the most disrespectful thing you could do to a drunk was to put your hands behind your back.  It’s a visual que that you’re not afraid of them and you could take the hit.

            I slid my hands behind my back and looked my “evil” manager dead in the eye and said, “Ok”.  That’s it…nothing more, no implication of evil or being upset or really engaging in any other act than acknowledging him.  “Ok” in the same tone you’d give a grocery store clerk asking if plastic was ok.

            “Noooooo…that’s not ok…whats going on…whats wrong…what aren’t you telling me…” his tone went from aggressive and about to lose a few teeth in the fit of rage I was going to unleash to fearful and “in the dark”.

            “I need to get back to selling cars now…are we done?”  I looked at my General Manager who was in a state of shock.  I found out later he was waiting for me to unleash hell and had gone into “fear mode” trying to figure out how to stop everything.

            While my “evil” manager was still trying to figure out what I meant by “OK” I walked out the door.  Not angry or upset…just casually strolled out the door and made sure not to slam the door as I closed it.  In doing so I saw the start of an hour long conversation between the two on what had just happened.

            I realized in a split second how to handle this jerk.  He was the kind of person who enjoyed manipulating and instigating drama.  By simply not engaging in his games I not only pissed him off, but avoided being tied up in a aggravating situation.

            For the next month or so I decided to take it to an extreme.  I made it a point to use as few words as possible with him as I could.  “Yes” or “No” were ideal…almost like the bit from the original Tron movie from the 70’s. 

“Did you they tell you anything about their trade?”

I nodded and said “Yes”.

“Ok…what did they tell you?”  I pointed at the trade appraisal slip with notes on it.  “Are you going to talk to me today?” 

I barely smiled and said “No” and then walked back to my customer.  Its important to note that I had given him everything he needed to complete his job as my manager without engaging in the typical drama that came with it.  It was heaven, the guy was so put off by my activity he started avoiding me whenever possible.

To save face he even handed a few deals off to other managers because he was “busy” when I had a deal to work.  The culmination of the over simplified communication project was during a contest where the managers were picking teams.  I had just finished my best month in the dealership and was the salesman of the month.  Interesting how that worked out when I wasn’t fighting pointless arguments for his amusement every 30 minutes.

“I can’t pick Justin because he’s mad at me or something…”  and the room didn’t laugh like he hoped.  It was the awkward chuckle you give someone so it isn’t creepy quiet.  Two of the other managers had to look away because they began to laugh at the reaction of not only me, but the room.

The lesson learned in this case is to choose your battles wisely.  Understand your “enemy” and don’t feed into their process.  Use a “pattern interrupt” to get outside of the norm.  Break the cycle that gets you worked up and, occasionally, in trouble by hyper focusing on your duties.

Had he written me up for my actions what was he going to say?  “Justin is doing his job and won’t fight with me when I feel like being an ass.”  Or “Justin is mad at me because I interfere with his job duties on a regular basis.”  Take away the power the bully has and they become helpless. 

I’m not going to lie…I’ve had some vivid dreams since that instance where I took that shot in the office.  The first punch always feels so damn good in the dreams.  It always gets way out of hand after that and I would probably be writing this on toilet paper in my cell had I not had that moment of clarity. 

The virtues of selling on value vs. price.

            When I was working for New York Life Insurance Company I had a client who gave me a whole new perspective in one case.  The perspective he gave me has changed the way I sold things from that day forward.  Its also changed the way I purchase things on my own behalf.

            I’ll spare you the details but I lucked into having a client who needed a long term care insurance policy.  Long term care, for those who don’t know, is a policy that pays for your nursing care in your later years.  Its cheaper to have you stay in your home than a skilled nursing center so these policies and companies fight to keep you at home as long as you can.  There are even tax incentives to make purchasing one of these policies more appealing.

            This particular client was someone who knew me from when I was a kid.  Honestly, I think he took the meeting because he wanted to help my career out and I was the rookie.  Regardless of the outcome I knew the experience would help me grow as an agent.

            I’ve always been a fan of being an expert in what your good at.  If you’re not an expert, know someone who is and get them involved when you’re out of your depth.  Nobody will ever complain you brought a specialist in to work on something important to get right.  Our office had a long term care (LTC) specialist and I brought her in to help me work the case.

            When we sat down with the client and his wife she instantly started to go through her somewhat scripted process.  She normally worked with clients who could afford the policies but were more focused on the daily aspects of living.  This particular client had been a CEO for years and was the President of a company at the time.

            When she started asking questions designed to illustrate a gap in your current plan her presentation fell apart.  “If you were sick where would you go?”  Most people respond with “a doctor” but this guy responded with a specific doctors name.  “If your house had mold what would you do?”  Most people would call a mold specialist, however, this client had a general handyman he had worked with for years and used his name.  “If your car was broken where would you take it?”  Again, the obvious answer is “a mechanic” but he not only said the specific dealership name but the salesman who handled things like this for him. 

            After some laughing at how “squared away” he was she was afraid to read her final question.  I knew there was one more question because I could see it on her printed notes in front of her.  I stepped in at this point, “Lets assume you didn’t have these contacts or knew exactly where to go to solve a problem…wouldn’t it be worth while to have someone you trust give you direction?”  He got where she was going and we got back on track.

            After laying out how the policies work and what was covered we came to the dreaded “money” question.  “Now, we agree these are valuable features in the policy, right?”  You could hear how uneasy she was after being thrown off her script.  “How much would you be willing to invest in a policy like this?”  And with that she sat quiet.

            For those of you who don’t know this rule its an amazing technique.  When you’re negotiating and you lay out your solution, whatever it is, stop talking.  “The first person to talk looses.” Was what an old sales manager once told me.  He and I stared at a piece of paper, with a customer, in total silence, for 45 minutes once.  The customer ended up buying the car and I learned a huge lesson on the “hard sale”.

            However, this wasn’t your easily closed client.  He thought about it, I think he recognized the technique, and then after a few seconds said.  “If its worth it, I’ll pay it.”  I was surprised to hear that come out of his mouth but I began to understand it.  Meanwhile my “specialist” restated the question and fumbled through trying to get a number commitment.  “Look, I don’t want my children to have to take care of me and my wife when we’re older.  This policy does that and more.  If you can show me enough value in the policy, I don’t care what it costs…because its worth it.”

            After I picked up the ball from where my slack jawed “specialist” left things we concluded our meeting and agreed to meet up again in a week with our solution.  We went back into our cubicle bullpen for new agents and began to recap the meeting.

            A few days go by and we meet to go over the plan.  She had 3 plans laid out that were a few hundred dollars a month and fairly modest benefit periods.  I had played around with the software and knew there was an “Unlimited/Unlimited” option for the policy.  Basically, the policy paid out unlimited funds for an unlimited benefit period.  If you triggered the policy you were taken care of in the very best way possible. 

            “Lets show them that…its what he wants”  We argued for a half an hour and she was afraid to scare him out of the room with the premiums.  The premiums were more than some mortgage payments, but the value was there.

            I knew my cohort would chicken out so I printed out the unlimited/unlimited policy information.  We went in and sure enough, she presented the smaller policies.  The client had a look of disappointment on his face and it felt like he was choosing the lesser of the three evils put in front of him.  “There is one more option I want to show you.  In my opinion this is the highest bang for your buck in a policy like this.”  I explained how the unlimited/unlimited policy worked while my “specialist” shook in her boots.  I finished up going over the policy and said, “Was I correct in thinking that the kind of value you were looking for in a policy?”

            Immediately after I finished my sentence he looked at his wife and smiled.  “This means we’re taken care of until we die and the kids don’t have to take care of us unless they want to.  That’s what we talked about right?”  She had tears in her eyes and held his hand and nodded.  He looked back at me and said “Yup…lets write it up”.

            With my first long term care sale I was the salesman of the month in our region.  It was my ONLY long term care sale in my time there, but still.  It was a huge victory for a rookie agent.

            The lesson I learned was to sell based on the value of a product, not the price.  The more value you build in something the harder it is to say “no” to.  Admittedly, I got lucky with this instance by having someone who could afford the policy, but the premise is the same. 

            As I went on from the insurance world I found myself doing everything I could to add value to what I was selling.  Occasionally I would lose a customer or client in a price battle.  But they were typically difficult people who weren’t worth the extra time and effort to appease for no money.  The people who bought from me bought the value I showed them and subsequently brought me more business.  That’s right, I charged them more than my competitors and they brought me more people to sell to.  The experience and the value they found in me was worth the price they had to pay.

            I’ve found myself buying things with the same mentality.  If its worth it, I’m going to pay more for it.  Ironically when I buy a cheap(er) version of the big ticket item I’m looking at I’m always disappointed.  But knowing I’m buying a lower value proposition makes it easier to accept the negative aspects and move on.

The power of doing the right thing

            So last week I wrote a story about my old manager in the car business.  I had some good feedback from people who read the article and they expressed condolences for having worked with someone like that.  While it’s a bit comical to have that reaction it helped me “purge” the experience from my mind.

            Rather than sharing the horrible negatives of the experience with one manager I decided to not only share more stories about the “evil boss” but examples of the “good boss” who also worked at the same location.  Much like the yin yang in every bit of negative there needs to be positive.

            One night early in my career I was working with an airman from Texas.  He was interested in trading in his two wheel drive FJ cruiser (yes they exist) and buying a truck for the Nebraska winters.  After giving him plenty of grief about his “poser” FJ with knobby tires and winch we were having a good time.

            We had two trucks on the lot that met his criteria.  Ironically they were parked next to each other and the one was a dark blue and the other was black.  There was an $8000 price difference between the two as one had much higher miles.  That more expensive truck was out of the budget we were looking at but it was the truck he wanted.

            At this time most of the sales staff and managers had left for the night.  It was getting late and we were down to minimal staff waiting for me to close this deal.  My “non-evil” manager was cutting to the chase but staying within the procedures set fourth by the dealership.  We were having fun joking around while he crunched numbers to keep our moods positive.  I always enjoyed working deals with him because he gave you the information and then double checked to make sure you understood what it meant.

            After several hours of working the numbers we were close to making the deal.  We were within $100 of the figures working out and getting the deal closed.  I pulled the CarFax to show that the vehicle hadn’t been in a wreck.  It was then we noticed something somewhat shocking.

            The truck we had been working numbers on was the more expensive VIN trucks VIN number.  The tricky part was we had been using the financials of the cheaper truck the whole time.  This was a huge error that had slipped through the cracks.  The airman was blown away, as was I, and the thought of potentially starting over was hanging in the air.

            I brought the mistake to the attention of my manager.  When you’re the last people in a dealership you can get away with some things you normally wouldn’t do.  In this case the loud bellowing “YAWP” from my manger went mostly un noticed.  After some chewing on his toothpick he simply said, “well…lets do this.”

            He walked back into the room with my airman nervously texting away on his phone.  My manager sat down and with a heavy head said, “Well…we screwed up and have been working the wrong truck this whole time.  I’m a man of my word so if you want this truck for that price I’ll sell it for that…tonight only…so we can wrap this up and get out of here.  What do you say?”  with that he held out his giant catcher mitt sized hand to shake.  (He’s a friend to this day so I can’t write a glowing article about his positive attributes without giving him some grief)

            The airman, who wanted the black truck from the start, lit up and smiled ear to ear.  “Deal” and with that we hastily wrapped up everything so we could all get the hell out of there.

            The truck was a major loss in terms of profitability for the dealership.  I made the bare minimum you can make on a car deal.  I felt like I had failed the dealership in some way.  But my “non-evil” boss sensed my feeling off.  “You can’t win them all…and sometimes you need to do the right thing no matter what it costs you.”

            It was then I knew it was possible to have integrity in the auto world.  An industry full of “misfit toys” and a history of being despicable still had some bastions of hope and moral fiber.

            The airman not only loved the truck but he came back to buy his dream car from me later that year.  We ordered it from the factory with every nut and bold with his name on it.  To this day it was the only glass roofed Mustang GT I’ve ever seen in Omaha.  Its also “Gotta Have it Green” so its not to hard to miss on the streets.  If you don’t know what that color is imagine hooking up a lime to 100 watts of power and covering it with baby oil.  It’s a color that stands out from miles away and looks alive when you’re close.

            While these deals weren’t the deals I was going to retire on they did set a few things in motion.  Firstly, I found an example of what I wanted to become in the auto industry.  Luckily for me he was willing to mentor me when my “assigned” mentors did little to help me grow.  The Mustang was the first USAA purchase in the dealership.  Within a few months of his purchase we became the USAA dealership closest to the large Air Force Base down the interstate.  The volume of cars we sold to USAA members at home and even deployed more than made up for the loss on the truck.

            Both guys are still good friends to this day.  I’m constantly referring buyers to my “non-evil” boss who is running on of the highest rated dealerships in the Midwest.  When asked what his secret was by one of the owners his response was so simple it was genius, “do the right thing, every time”.  While I can’t refer much to the airman I still enjoy seeing photos of his mustang as it has morphed into “Hulk”.

A good story and some help from Andrew Jackson

            Sometimes all you need to do is give someone a good story.  This is especially true when you’re dealing with someone who doesn’t seem to understand the situation.  Sadly, this happens a lot in the auto industry.

            When I was working for a local Ford dealership as an Internet Sales Manager I worked with all kinds of people.  No two days were ever the same and it was a great experience if you had the desire to work with people.  Sometimes your customers were amazing and you ended up becoming great personal friends even after the sale.  Other times you wanted to vomit whenever you heard their name.

            One day I got an internet lead on a guy who wanted to buy a Platinum package F-150.  This is a $56,000 truck and usually means one of two things.  You have a kid who’s dreaming big and you’re in for a nightmare of a deal.  Or, you have someone who can afford it and they know exactly what they want.

            Luckily for me this was the latter of the two.  He turned out to be an Airman stationed at the local Air Base and was about to go to flight school.  He wanted to buy the truck before he left for training.  This was an easy transaction because we participated in USAA pricing for active military.  (something I helped push through)

            He showed up and spent 2 hours going over the features of the truck, checking out small details, and driving it.  I could tell this was the right truck for him and he was excited about it.  However, I could see there was something afoot with this deal that wasn’t evident just yet.

            “Ok…I’ll talk to you later then!”  And he walked away toward his car, out of nowhere.  This is the ultimate nightmare for any car sales person.  Your “Up” (prospective customer) is leaving the property without talking to someone else…which meant you’re going to be humiliated publicly by your manager.  I finally stopped him in the middle of the drive and asked where he was going.  “Oh its no big deal…I just need to crunch some numbers and think about it for a day.”

            I’ll spare you the boring details but he ended up leaving after we worked up some numbers.  The entire time he was about as readable as wet toast.  After a while I gave up and let him go, the guy was just done talking.

            After my day off I walked into the dealership to find my buddy Jason had worked with the airman yesterday.  This happens all the time and now both of us are on the line to close the deal to get HALF of the money.  Jason was a pretty stand up guy so I knew he had done everything on the up and up so I didn’t have to worry.  “That dude was hard to read!  He came in all excited and then just kinda went limp…what the hell?”

            Over the next two weeks Jason and I effectively “tag teamed” this guy with emails, phone calls, and yet more visits to the dealership.  Each time the guy just wanted to drool over the truck and learn more about some bizarre detail that nobody ever cares about.  I honestly think he asked if the lug nuts were right hand thread at one point…but I got so zoned out talking to him its all a blur.

            Finally, one day Jason and I have the guy in the dealership and he’s starting to show signs of life.  We decided the best way to handle it was to work the deal together.  After 5 hours of the two of us in a small room with this guy we’re at the end of the deal.  We had stripped out everything and given up more ground on this truck than we thought was possible.  We had so much time invested in this guy we weren’t going to let him go this time.

            Our boss on the final pencil had told me, “if he doesn’t take this deal…get his ass out of here.”  He was as done dealing with this guy as Jason and I were.  At this point Jason and I were looking at a commission of $150 for a truck with an MSRP of $56,000.  Oh yeah…and we had to split the $150 for the last 3 weeks of work.

            “Well this is it…we’re done dealing.  There is nothing left in this deal.  We’re literally at the take it or leave it stage.”  I said.

            “I still feel like I should get something for free”  He said as I grinded my teeth and tried not to come over the table at this guy.  After even more deliberation and long drawn out awkward pauses he finally began to sign his name.  Jason and I glanced at each other in astonishment.

            He started to write the vertical part of an “A” in the first part of his name, then stopped and dropped the pen.  “I’m sorry guys I know $14,000 off the sticker is a hell of a deal but I feel like I need something for free here.  Oil changes or a gift card or something…”  It took everything I had to not slap this guy at this point.

            “Ok…the dealership is done dealing at this point.  Jason and I are all that’s left holding this deal together.  I’ll tell you what…”  I pull out my wallet.  “I’ll give you $20 from my own pocket if you shut up and sign your name.”  With that I pulled out a crisp $20 bill and laid it on the table.  “You’ll be the only guy you know who has the story about a car salesman giving you $20 to take a crazy deal like this.  But I want you to promise me some referrals so I can make my $20 back.”

            Jason was sitting on a file cabinet and had a look on his face that I’ll never forget.  To his credit, he didn’t say a word, which made the gesture even more powerful.

            After some awkward laughter from the guy he signed the paperwork and took the deal.  We got everything done and punted him down the road as quickly as possible.  Jason took the lead while I spewed profanity in the back.

            I realized all this guy wanted was a story.  His own story was pretty bland and other than being a fighter pilot he had nothing.  The truck he bought was his way of stepping up to the image of a fighter pilot.  He worked the deal not based on financials but on building a story he could tell the guys in his unit.

            Jason and I talked later and he was shocked I paid the guy.  When he asked me why I did it I told him.  “We were already making a split mini so the money wasn’t a factor.  However, I’m getting close to a $500 volume bonus for the month and this ½ deal could be the thing that puts me over the top.”  Jason nodded and agreed it was a good call…ballsy…but a good call.  “Plus, we’re finally done with that guy and can spend more time on other customers!”

            I ended up making my volume bonus later that month by…you guessed it…1/2 a car deal.  However the bonus I made was the second tier bonus that paid me a second $500.  As for our customer he left the state and we never heard from him again.  The last contact we had with him was on the Ford Survey they send out on new vehicle purchases.  If you can believe it the guy burned us on the survey because the process took too long.