Bipolar manager who loved to hate

            Of all the managers I’ve ever had, the all time worst manager I’ve had almost killed me.  I know you may think that’s a figure of speech but I mean it in a literal sense.  The managerial style of this man was so far out of whack that I began to respond to it physically, and my health declined.

            It all started off well, nothing out of the ordinary and I kind of enjoyed the way we interacted.  As time went on and the “honeymoon” phase of being the new hire wore off the reality set in.  As time went on it grew worse and worse and there wasn’t much we, as a sales staff, could do.

            There are so many examples of how terrible this guy was that I could write a whole series of stories about him in this blog.  Having just written that I may have to do that as part of my ongoing process of moving on from this nightmare.

            In the car business, as a salesman,  you have to bring your deals to the sales manager when you’re working them.  The process starts with filling out a worksheet on your customer.  Once you’ve got all the pertinent information you take it to your manager and they go to work.

            “Oh my god…what do you want?” he would say.  “You’re ruining my life…why are you up here again?!?”  Once you handed him the worksheet his demeanor would change.  “Ok…cool…well lets work and get you a car deal.”  He would pencil the details on the sheet and hand it back.  “Here you go, you got this you can do it.”  And then you’d walk back to your customer.

            Ninety percent of America realizes the first offer from a dealership is designed to put you on the ceiling.  Its so far from what  you asked if anyone took the first pencil you knew there was a bigger problem waiting down the line.  You did what we were trained to do and get an offer, sometimes with a check in hand.

            “How’d you do?” he would say as he read the paper you handed him with the new offer.  “Oh my god…this is pathetic!  That’s the best offer you can get from this customer?!?  Do you want me to get a real salesman to go over and fill out the order form?”  Sometimes he would grab a salesman working another deal and “jokingly” ask if he could step in and close the deal. 

            After some scribbling and some number crunching he would hand the paper back.  “Ok…you’ve got a car deal here you just need to get their thinking up a little from this offer.  You’re close and you can do this.”  And with that he’d send you back.

            After yet more negotiation with the customer you’d head back up to the “tower of power” for more bludgeoning from him.  “Holy catfish!  You’re doing a great job representing the customer today…you know we’d like to make some money here.”  It was at this point, by the prescribed procedural guidelines he had the option of stepping in and working with the customer himself.  Sometimes he would grab one of the newer sales managers to do it for him.  “Can you go sell this guy a car…he apparently can’t do it.  Get out of my face.” 

            So now, assuming he got off his ass and didn’t take a phone call from his wife in the middle of the deal, he’s walking in to work with your customer.  The same customer who you’ve been telling him “$10,000 down and $1500 a month is the best we can do” when they asked for zero down and $500 a month for 60 months.

            He would walk in with a big cheesy smile and a token laugh at a bad joke.  He would make small talk about anything obvious and then act like he’d never seen the numbers in his hand.  As the salesman you were required to sit there and not say a word.  Frequently, you were standing behind him looking like a moron staring at his chicken scratches.

            “So if I could get you close to that $500 a month for 60 months would you buy the car today?”  The would obviously shake their head “yes” and he’d say.  “Ok, let me go to work for you and see if we can make that happen.”  And we’d walk back up to the tower.

            “God damn it why didn’t you do _______” was usually the first thing he said.  Ironically followed by “They’re nice people though…you’ve got a car deal here…hang in there.”  If there was an attractive woman in the mix he would make a comment about having her move in with him in the small town he lived in. 

            In the final stages of the deal he would sometimes tell you to “write it up ya big softie” and you’d go write up the deal.  Other times he would take another stab at the customer to ultimately find a middle ground.  Regardless of how the deal was struck as you gathered the 15 different forms to put the deal together every time you walked within ear shot he would make a cutting remark about how worthless you were.

            This happened every time you had to work a deal with him.  It took different forms when you had to interact with him on different things as well.  Ultimately I was so enraged by the way he treated me I was drinking the 5 Hour energy sleep aide in the middle of the day to calm down. 

            There were half a dozen times where, in an argument started by him, I found myself gnashing my teeth and with a white knuckled fist repeating, “You can’t hit him…you can’t hit him.” 

            In the car business it’s a dog eat dog world, there’s no getting around this.  But the difference between horsing around and poking fun at your buddy and managerial bullying is night and day.  For one month I chose to only respond to him with “yes” or “no”.  Anything else was in as few words as possible. 

            Because I wouldn’t engage with his crap he would try it and it wouldn’t go anywhere.  It infuriated him so much he began to badger me when I was away from him.  By not engaging in the bashing and berating behavior from him and waiting to work deals with the other managers I found a loophole.

            That month was the salesman of the month and sold the most cars in my career.  I sold them to spite my manager and the hatred of this man drove me in a way that was scary.

            This was also the month I was pulled over on a test drive and got out of it when I disclosed to the officer I had my concealed carry on me.  That’s right, I carried a loaded 9mm handgun on me at the dealership from my interview until the day they banned it.  When I got back he was giving me shit about the ordeal and asked how I got out of it.  “You’re not that good of a salesman so how did you get out of the ticket?”  I smiled and told him “I told him what I was legally obligated to tell him…I have a concealed carry, its loaded, and my permit is in my wallet.”

            The look on his face was priceless when I showed him the imprint of my handgun on my shirt.  My used car manager at the time was a close friend of mine and belly laughed.  “You dumbass, he’s been packing since he started!  Trowbridge is always strapped!  You might want to lay off him in the future too you jackass!”  He did for a few weeks but went right back to it.

            I’ve run into dozens of people who worked with this man over the years.  Almost every single one of them has similar stories.  The part that really disturbed me was that he was a sponsor for AA.  Someone trying to get their life back in line had this asshole to rely on when they were fighting their demons.  It makes me sick just thinking about it.  I will always remember working with him…and I’ll always remember how NOT to manage people.